This I Believe: Bromance


Devan Gary and Mekayla Phan

I am a believer of many things. I believe in ideas, in theories, and in thoughts, whether they are absurd or brilliant. What do I believe in this very moment? I believe in the concept that “Bromances” are the best type of relationship you can, and will ever have.

Some of you may ask yourself, “What exactly is Bromance?” A bromance can simply be defined as a close, emotionally intense, non-sexual bond between two or more men/bros. It is an extremely affectionate, homo-logical male bonding relationship exceeding that of a usual friendship, and is distinguished by a particularly high level of bro love. There is a lot of touching, staring, and thinking that occurs between one and his bros.

Bromances are better than any other type for many reasons.  In a bromance, you can get away with much more than you can, when in a relationship with just a girl. When you come in contact with a girl, it is considered inappropriate, or disrespectful. However, when you approach a bro, he is already expecting you to come in physical contact with him in some shape or form, whether it is a handshake, a head bump, or a caress of chest, bicep or other places that cannot be named. You will simply receive more love from a bro than you ever will from a girl.

Bros are there for you no matter the time, no matter the situation, no matter the destination. You need a bench spot? Your bro will be there to guide your chest gains. Need a bro’s advice on your question of “Hey bro, does this shirt make my arms look big?” He’ll give you an honest answer so you can make sure you have everyone mirroring your aesthetics. You need a shoulder to cry on after a girl does you cold? Your bro will be there with love and support. Bromances are goals. No girl can give you this satisfaction.

Being in a bromance is exceptionally easy. You just have to be a bro. What does being a bro consist of? Only things that are relevant to your bromance and everyday life. To be a bro, you have to have a male appendage; you have to partake in some form of athletics or competition to promote your testosterone to show everyone who isn’t a bro, that you’re an Alpha bro.  This includes sports, lifting, cross fit (just kidding, that’s for girls), acquiring gains, and self improvement athletics.  You also need to be into video games of any kind, frats, wearing tight and/or no t-shirts, girls if they do not interfere with you and your bros, and jeeps or decked out lifted Chevy trucks (Ford trucks are for women). Bromances contain the best things in life. There are more, but these are the most important.

There are many bros in your everyday life and any and every bro shall receive infinite love. Girls weep, for they will never experience what being in a bromance is like. Being a part of one is very special and you should take privilege and care in your bromance. I believe that bromances are the best relationship you can ever have.